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The first time a breast 'accidentally' fell out of a bikini top I told the owner to put it back. She did so giggling, even though I was frowning. It didn't take very long before another girl had the same accident. I managed to get them to turn the stereo off while I told them that the rules for tonight were for no sex. I considered bare breasts to be over that line, so if it happened again the girl would be red-carded for breaking the rule. That sowed quite a lot of confusion, as boys weren't supposed to behave that way, and using sex as bait was the sole strategy of all of the girls that were trying.^Just in case you think I've developed a sudden aversion to large, naked female breasts, I'd better explain some of my earlier thinking.I had already decided that this group was almost certainly doomed; competitiveness, arrogance and stupidity do NOT make for good girlfriends! Sadly, not even if they have large breasts that keep falling out of their bikini tops. They were insultingly. “Sometimes she’s at home, and sometimes she sleeps over. But more and more I think it’s just about the sex, because I know how much she misses you and wants you back home.”“Really?” I said, finally finding my voice, trying not to shoot the messenger, softening my tone and volume as I repeated the question. “Really, Charlotte, or are you just saying that to try and save my feelings?”“No, really, Dave. I’m being totally straight with you. If I’d wanted to lie to you, I’d have told you she’s home most of the time, and that would have been a lie.”I think she’d let slip a little more than she meant to, and I pounced on the unintended fact. “So, she’s not home most of the time, then? So, what would you say, she’s home just the odd day, or not even that, or maybe more than that? ”I’ve always been obsessed with numbers – to me there’s a kind of honest purity in them. Words can be manipulated to mislead and lie. But numbers generally don’t lie, and so I knew Charlotte’s answer would give me a.
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